Wednesday, December 30, 2009

11 until 30

Fears: Only that I will not have learned from my past enough - and repeat the same mistakes.

Of course, like all the other fears- this is up to me.

Gratitude: That I have this time to let my friends and family know what an impact they've had on me.

Inspirational Person of the Day:

I first started following her blog about 2 years ago, as she was preparing for her Disney World wedding. Over time, I got curious and started poking around to her other blogs, and got to know the woman a little better than just "the Bride".

I know this may sound silly, but reading her blogs were my final push to get back on the blogging train. You see, by reading her blogs were comforting for me. Afterall, we've all faced our own challenges, demons, heartbreaks and dreams come true. That's when it hit me. I realized that "Maybe there's something to just sharing my story that could help someone else out there?" So I finally started blogging. While I've yet to reach any record setting following, it's been a great experience that I would love to do more of (if my computer equipment weren't from the stone-age).

Anyway- thanks for writing BeingCarly! Best of luck in 2010!

13 til 30

Fear: I guess I'm out of fear right now. I've been blessed with some peace and grace this new year. Things will be what they will be. My job is just to do my best.

Gratitude: For the sanity good counsel always brings!

Inspirational Person(People) of the Day:


I first met TheManInBlack in 2006, during a local theater production of Guys and Dolls. I was in the cast, and he was in the crew. Being a crew for a community theater production is a thankless job, and at the time, he scared the daylights out of me and I wanted nothing to do with him. But I later learned that the tough demeanor is really just a defense mechanism. Afterall, you can keep most people at bay with it, and only flash a smile to those you want in your life. (At least that's my theory. He swears it's just a hard rock style. Since I'm not a fashionista- what do I know!)

Anyway, spending time with him and his family has given me an tiny peek at a different way of family life. The cultural difference between the way families work is always facinating and heartwarming to see. It's also let me see just how tough being a single parent can be - especially of three kids! All from his previous marriage, and all pretty well adjusted nearly-teenagers now (though the oldest will be 16 later this month).

I've admired the way he usually finds an equitably solution when issues arise, and isn't afraid to be a "parent", rather than a "friend". That doesn't necessarily mean a disciplinarian 24/7. It means listening with an open heart, understand, and retaining that authority necessary to guide impressionable minds into a place where they can truly consider their actions (and the consquences of them).
I also admire how he's tied with almost visible heart strings to his kids. No woman could ever hope to have a bond as strong - but then again, parents and children are a dynamic that I can only relate to from my limited, unmarried with a furkid, perspective. I have the upmost respect for single parents now - perhaps a deeper one than ever before. I understand that they are on the most difficult road possible - but also one that has room for lots of rewards as well. I've been able to bear witness to many touching moments between the gang all together, and I know they will all plunge into the future as a strong family.

(Bottom - Clydas. On cooler - Me. Left to right - TheManInBlack, JMArabians, and LiketoAct.)

14 til 30 (W/ Disclaimer)

Fear: I got nothin' today. :)

Gratitude: Today I'm grateful for lazy Saturday mornings (like todays!)

Inspirational Person of the Day:

Gerber Baby Family!

I've known the adults of this happy family since Middle School and High School.

Now, let me tell you, they were High School Sweethearts. Very few of those folks end up sticking together long enough to get married years later, but they managed to do it. Sure, they had their off and on moments (and sometimes I think they are going for the Gold if bickering was an Olympic Sport), but they've made the big commitment now.

The things that inspire me about these people though is their commitment to family and devotion to one another. They've been through a lot in their 10+ years together. They've taken their individual natural inclinations toward stubborness, and invested that in their relationship, making it rock solid. As for the bickering I mentioned, I've learned to understand and respect it a bit more. It shows that they feel free to express their feelings to one another, even if those feelings are just "warm fuzzies".

As for Gerber Baby? Well, spending time with him reminds me that the parenting gig is a lot of work. But the smile on his face when his parents come back to take over reminds me why that kind of thing is worth it.

Disclaimer: I am WAY behind on updating this. Life has been pretty hectic and I like to really spend time thinking before I write/blog, so I had to warp ahead.

24 til 30 - Corrected!

Fear: Not resolving the "what ifs" of the past in way that helps me leave room for the future.

Gratitude: That my life feels like it's going in the right direction, with all the love and support from those around me.

Inspirational Person of the day:

I can't discuss people who have had a profound effect on me over the years without mentioning this particular person.

FlyBoy and I have known each other for a very long time, but we've never actually met, face to face. I met FlyBoy under the guise of Ashta - one of the very first freeform online roleplaying characters I developed. When I was a teenager, almost every free moment that wasn't spent in Drama Club or ShowChoir in High School, was spent online, writing. (For those that don't know, online freeform roleplaying is pretty much being in a chat room. Only, instead of being yourself, you are whatever your imagination can come up with. Dwarves, mages, vampires, elves, etc. Ashta is a headstrong, solitary creature that I may blog more about at a later date. But this blog isn't about Ashta - and I could write a book alone just about her.)

As far as we can agree, I was 16 when our characters met, and he was 14. We met first as our characters (Ashta and Lazarus) and later got to know each other OOC (out of character).

(FlyBoy is in black in the back - I figure this may have been taken near the age we "met".)

So here we are, well over a decade later, and time has proven to me just how much we've both grown and changed. And now I count him among one of the closest people to me, though we've never actually been in the same state.

Growing any type of relationship long distance requires communication skills that, let's face it, most of us are sorely lacking now-a-days. One thing I admire about FlyBoy is that, well, he doesn't seem to have a problem there. He's one of few people I can debate with, and not feel attacked. Even though we disagree on some topics, he treats the subject with the upmost respect and manages to speak with gentle passion on the topics that we may not agree on. Since I'm not big on conflict, this is a STRONG tribute to his communication skills. He's also the type to call just to say hi and talk, rather than expecting Myspace, Facebook, a text do the trick. (Maybe this is unique to my relationship w/ him, as we've never NOT been long distance, but there ya go.) He also understands the "unspoken" communication - like when I need to just be a hermit for a while. Regardless of the situation, a conversation with FlyBoy usually leaves me smiling - if only for the reliefe of someone who speaks my lanuage and understands me - 1/2 way across the country. Afterall, who couldn't use a reminder that they aren't crazy every once in a while? ;)

FlyBoy shares traits some of those dearest to me have. He also gives it to me straight and honestly all the time. He has ambition for his future and knows himself well enough to know where he needs to grow, what he wants to protect, and where he wants to go.

But I'd like to focus on his steadfast spirit (aka stubborness). When he decides on something, I have no doubt he'll accomplish it. His unwaivering beliefe and support for me and my personal goals reminds me of the person I try to be for others. He goes a step beyond being a cheering squad. FlyBoy takes an active role whenever possible. When he heard I was training for a triathlon/marathon, he e-mailed me a guide that he thought could help me get off the coach and complete my goal. When reporting in on my attempts at weight-loss, he was right there, cheering me on - not just reading my blogs when it was convienent, but taking time out of his day/night to call and see how things were going. When I was struggling through the difficult relationship messes in my past, he's been there to listen, advise, or just truly sympathize (and vice versa).

(FlyBoy today, in black on the right)

He's far from a doormat, but his kindness and consideration have left an imprint on my heart - and a challenge to be no less than my best.

Revelation of the Week: While love is a gift, strive to be worthy of it - and you'll never lose it.

Tuesday, December 29, 2009


As I think I mentioned before, I flew off to Phoenix earlier this month to solidify/renew my Certification as a Medical Coding Professional.

For the record, I passed with flying colors.

Yeah! Success!

Even though I'm on my way out of this feild, it's great to have some bread and butter solidly under my belt again.

Thanks folks for all the P&P (prayers and postive thoughts) and support!

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

The long awaited Christmas Blog...

My Christmas List:
If I picked one "toy" for the year, it would be a Wii Fit. Since that price tag is pretty high, I'd rather have things I can use.
I need two more large tupperware bins to store things that can no longer be sheltered by my shed (which will eventually be torn down).
I could always use gasoline and grocery store gift cards.
Blockbuster gift cards never miss either.

That's the tangible stuff I want.

A Confession:
I haven't really decorated much. I have 2 garlands out (one of which has a light bulb out so, of course, the entire strand is out). I don't have a tree. I have a few candles out and that pretty much covers it.

It's actually kinda pathetic. And I'll admit, I was feeling sorry for myself. I am not hosting a party this year (not for lack of trying, just for lack of, well, guests able to come to them). Last year, I hosted two great ones back to back! So this is quite the shift. In fact, I haven't hosted a party all year. The truth be told, I don't have that many local friends anymore, and those that I do have consider having kids a hinderence to traveling outside of their general 3 mile radius. So that leaves an unmarried gal like me living alone feeling left a bit out in the cold.

An old Epiphany Visiting:
And then I realized...I need to take my own advice. I've said on this blog "You can't always control the scenery, but you can control the thermostat." I asked myself a few vital questions:

Is it within my power to change the mood I've been in?
Do I enjoy feeling this way?

So, am I actually going to do something about it, or just drive my friends crazy with my belly-aching?
I'm going to do something about it.

Sure, I may not have anyone to share my Christmas decorations with this year. So what? Big deal! A lot of people don't even have decorations to start with, or a house to put them in! How dare I feel sorry for myself! What am I waiting on?! Sure I've been busy, but that's really no excuse. I've had plenty of late nights and down time.

And, damn it - I'm a family of one and it's about time I took care of this family a little better and injected some holiday spirit!

Since I have Christmas Eve off from work, I need to make the most of it. I'll be sleeping in and doing some Santa Drops with Clydas in tow! While I'm doing that, I'll stop off and pick up a tree big enough for me to handle. So what if my tree skirt will be bare this year. It's been a tough year for everyone, myself included. I can plop some Christmas tins or boxes under it if it really bothers me.

Still passing on the feasting:
Under normal circumstances, I'd spend the day cooking w/ family/friends. Since this year is just me, I think I'll save myself the hours of cooking (and clean up!) and just enjoy something a little simplier. A great bottle of wine, some great cheese, crackers, veggies, dip, and sausage might just round out my Christmas Eve dinner this year. If I get more ambitious, I'll grab a single serving lamb roast and do that or something. The aim this year is "simple".

After dinner, I'll be busy making FlyBoy's Slavik Nut Rolls (a tradition in his family that he's allowing me to share with my family this year). I'm actually really excited about, and contributing to my family's Christmas morning brunch the next morning.

That gives me a lot to do before Christmas morning, but I think it's a worthwhile persuit.

I'd like to be remembered as someone who kept Christmas well - even when no one was looking.

25 til 30

Fear: I won't accomplish my health goals this year.
This is a fear that's only somewhat within my control. Afterall, I can't control a cold, or other illness that might bring me a set back, but I know that if I stay focused, I CAN and WILL accomplish my health goals.

Gratitude: People actually seem to read what I have to say occasionally, and find it helpful/inspiring. This isn't the reason why I write, but I know how comforting it is to hear of other people/athletes going through a similiar challenge that I face, so I'm grateful that things like this blog may provide someone else similiar comfort.

Inspirational Person of the day:
Perhaps the best testimony I can give for this next installment is that I wouldn't have done this:

or this...

without the woman furthest to the right.

Don't take the cute little nickname to mean this woman isn't tough as nails. BonBon and I met when we were cast in opposite one another in an original musical comedy called American Standard. It was her first show and I was just plain focused on working on the show, not making friends. But admittedly, she's hard not to like.
We bonded like most women do, through heartache. See, it was opening weekend of that show that my troubled marriage finally dissolved. I'm sure it left the cast wondering if I'd make it opening night, but I couldn't let them down. And let me tell you, there is nothing like making people laugh to help speed along the healing process. I didn't expect to make some lifelong bonds through that show. (For those who know show biz, casts are like family during a show, and usually go their seperate ways after the final curtain call.) Then again, it was an unusual show - that called for an unusual cast to pull it off (over and over and over again).

I never would have considered doing a triathlon, if it weren't for Bonbon moving away. She was moving to Conneticut with her boyfriend, and here I was, feeling a bit lost, and working my way through life. She approached me and proposed the idea of a triathlon to me as a final "Hoorah" that we girls could do together before she left.
At first I was completely hesitant. As some of you may know, I'll give my last drop of blood and then some for a friend, but a triathlon?! Really? Afterall, triathlons aren't for women struggling with their weight, right? They are for the already skinny, trained, confident athletes. But I thought about her proposal every day, and when I listened to Lou Mongello's podcast I decided I could at least try. My goals were simple - not to come in last, and to finish.

And finish we did. She beat me by about 10 minutes. And I'm forever grateful for her quiet push into the sport that would change the way I view myself and everyday life challenges. I was reminded during that race to trust myself. I was reminded that I am the queen of underestimating myself. And I was reminded to keep an open mind.

While I did it for my friend initially, I found out on the track that I wasn't thinking of her. I wasn't thinking of anyone but myself. I was truly realizing what it ment to "live in the moment".

And for those life lessons, I'm eternally grateful to have crossed pathes with BonBon.

Anyway, BonBon has always been a very open soul, and the inspiring thing about her is her capacity to love and be open to love in her life. It only enhances an already beautiful person.

While creativity abounds in this once-actress-now-esthetician, I love how she pushes her own limits. Truly, though, she is a great example to me that caring for others doesn't mean you sacrifice taking care of yourself. That's something most women (perhaps most people) strive to balance. Whether it's a daily struggle for her or not, I may never know, but she achieves it with a quiet grace that I may never achieve.

It's always great to have reminders in our lives who carry traits we aspire to. It reminds us to never stop trying to become more than we are.
Thanks Bonbon! You're unflagging love and support are always a source or inspiration for me - and I'm glad you're on my team.

Monday, December 21, 2009

26 til 30

Fears: Not reaching my goals.

Gratitude: That no matter what happens to be going on with me, there almost always seems to be enough peace and love to share with others.

Inspirational Person of the day:


I happened to meet ComputerGuy in the summer of 2006, after a showing of Guys and Dolls that I was in for my local community theater . We chatted for a while and became fast friends.Eventually, he became one of the influential forces in my life.

There are more than a few admirable qualities about this guy, but one thing that inspires me is his insatiable curiosity. He seems to want to know things - everything. He can generate a sincere interest in just about anything. It's that insatiable zest and hunger for life that I treasure about people like him in my life. That quality pushes me to be more than I am and helps remind me that, no matter the situation, there is always something wonderous to discover in the world.

Another thing that I admire about this guy is his drive. Have you ever seen someone else so movtivated that it helps keep you on track? That's ComputerGuy for ya. I'm not known for my focus (though it's vastly improved over recent years), so this is definately a good reminder that anything can be acheived if you keep your eyes on the prize, plan your work, and work your plan.

And finally, probably the thing I like best about ComputerGuy, is his lack of a "filter". Though we don't talk often now-a-days, talking is definately not this man's short fall. I don't think he knows HOW to water down his opinion/feelings/truth as he sees it. While sometimes this may get him in trouble (as I'm sure it may come off as tactless to the wrong audience), I've always admired those that aren't afraid to name the Elephant in the Room - even if it may mean conflict is sure to ensue. Too often frankness is diluted so much that it loses it's potency.

Of course, there is a huge advantage to having people in your life who are so blatantly honest. It means a compliment is always as sincere as they come.

So thanks for being you, ComputerGuy!

27 til 30

Alright - back to throwing up a quick blog on my lunch break!

Fears: That I'll become a stress case that doesn't know how to relax.

The great thing about all of these fears is that the outcome of these perceived pitfalls is up to me. So actually, by jotting these things down, I'm reminded more and more that avoiding them is up to me.

Gratitude: For having the awareness to smack myself upside the head and pull myself out of my own funks.

Inspirational Person of the day:
Sistah' Girl!

It would be remiss of me not to include my best friend of over 15 years on this list. We met through the oddest of circumstances. We both attended a basically professional musical boot camp at Northern Arizona University in our early teens. It's funny how a few weeks at summer camp can make best friends.

We don't agree with each other all the time, but it's amazing how much our lives have intertwined over the years. It's as if we take turns guiding each other over various terrian in our lives. She's also on the short list of the people I know I can call no matter what.

One thing that's always impressed me about her is the strength of her faith and convictions. She's at her happiest when surrounded by like minds, praising God, and relying on Him. My spirituality has always been rather fluid. Don't get me wrong - I'd definately say I'm guided by the Christians compass internally. But Sistah'Girl probably has the makings of a missionary. She has a heart to help people (as evidenced by her choosen occupation - Emergency Medic) and I've never known her to be lonely or lacking friends.

And now, as she's aiming for conquering some personal demons and her first few triathlons, I'm very proud to have her in my life.

She's one of the few who's hung with me, not afraid to give it to me straight, and I know is always on my team. Seeing her grow and succeed gives me courage to keep on keepin' on.

28 til 30

I'm doing a bit of catch up here, so bear with me!

Fear: Becoming stagnant! The dictionary defines this as: "1. Not moving or flowing; motionless. 2. Foul or stale from standing. 3. Showing little or no sign of activity or advancement; not developing or progressing, inactive; Laking vitality or briskness; sluggish or dull." Now, this fear isn't specific to 30. Rather, it's always been something I've avoided at all cost. Sometimes (okay, "often" is more accurate) it leads me to burn by candle at both ends in an effort to grow, expand, and just keep an active, busy mind. It's pushed me to try new adventures that I'd never considered before when the oppurtunity arises. I may not be interested in it on my own, but it'll give me a new experience to tap into.

Gratitude: In thinking about this "30 inspirational people" part of the blog, I've become really grateful for the people who have touched my life. Sure, there are people at different distances from my heart for many reasons, but I count myself very blessed/lucky to have a few that I know I can call on in a time of need and lean on when I need to.

Which brings me to...

Inspirational Person of the Day!


Now, there was a time when I didn't believe in being friends with co-workers outside of work. But as I've gotten older, it's the best/easiest place to meet people. And, hey! You already have something in common - your boss! DigiGirl was the receptionist at my company somewhere around 2005/2006 I think. We started grabbing coffee (well, tea or hot chocolate for me) on breaks together, and became friends. She listened to my struggles with becoming newly unmarried, and, oddly enough, not long after my divorce went down, hers did too.

Though we had different approaches for how we dealt with the various challenges that unique situation brings, we really bonded through that, and our love for our furkids. Both of us realized we had to make some huge life changes, but that our furkids were along the same journey we were. While it ment relocating for both of us, it didn't mean leaving our furkids in the dust.

So we had a lot in common that kept us as good friends, even after she moved home away and in with her parents in order to complete nursing school.

What I most admire about her is her dedication. She left a well paying job that she realized wasn't going anywhere (and wasn't where she longed to be) to move back home with her parents and start nursing school. She's great at making a plan and working her plan. And I love that (and need more of that in my life).

Someone once said that you can be a victim of your situation, or an architect of your future. The decision is up to you. And no one proves that more than DigiGirl.

A mini update - and a call from the Vet

I was out of town over the weekend and didn't really make time to blog, so now that I'm back, I'll be doing just that. I have been having a bit of a crazy time, with the holidays breathing down my neck and all. But I think I've finally settled on a plan for the week to make it fun, relaxing, and to renew my Christmas spirit.

As many of you know, Clydas was in the kennel at his vet this weekend. I get to pick him up tonight and I'm so excited. I got a bit concerned today when I got a call from the Vet's office today though.

So tell me folks...
Is it a good sign when the vet tech asks if Clydas HAS to go home?

Friday, December 18, 2009

29 left of 29

With 29 days left until my 30th birthday, here's the fear, gratitude, and inspirational person of today!

I've been one of those women who has worked hard to stay in good physical shape my whole life. And this year of my life will be no different. Surviving a 3rd of my life doesn't give me the license to slack off. So what's the fear involved here? That I won't reach my physical goals. For some reason, the last few years have been riddled with random illnesses. Well, this year is going to be different. While I can't exactly control getting a cold or an allergy or something like that, I can take the stance of "So what?" when it comes to those germies and just focus on my goals. Like at least 2 Triathlons and at least 3 stage shows. Ambitious? Sure! But isn't that what goals are all about?

Gratitude: Today I'm grateful for my friends especially. I got a Christmas card from Candy Man and his clan yesterday and it completely made my day. It's funny how sometimes those little things are the moments that make my day...

Inspirational person of the day:
Actually, these would have to be "people", but since they share the same last name, I count them as "person".

HotMama and D have been friends of mine for years now. The funny part of that is, when HotMama and I met, I really wanted nothing to do with her. I was hard headed and young, and she was in a whole different world than she is now. Nowadays, we're in almost daily contact.

Anyway, when she met D off eharmony, I thought "wow, you guys are moving awefully fast!" Before their first dating anniversary, they had moved in together, gotten engaged and married, and just after their first dating anniversary and honeymoon, they transplanted themselves to Arizona (from their previous home in Carlsbad, California).

HotMama was a great source of nurturing and encouragement to me when I needed it most. I was going through a divorce that, while I was handling well, was definately life changing, and during that same time she was getting married. We were at polar opposite moments in our lives, but still managed to be there for one another. She helped me stumble through the day to day stuff, and I got to be there to hear her wedding woes. I think we sort of kept each other in check.

But that's just HotMama. What about this particular couple is inspirational to me? Their wedding was when I first noticed that they were one of those couples. The way D looked at HotMama during their wedding made me realize that I want that in my life someday.

Since their marriage, they've moved from California to Arizona to accomodate his schooling. Living off student loans and grants is tough when you're a single person, but even more so when you're a young couple. During that time frame, HotMama also got pregnant with their son, LittleD. Saddly, LittleD was still born. Most couples don't survive the death of a child. But they struggled through, leaning on one another, and in the midst of all of that (and multiple medical problems going on with HotMama), they concieved LittleE, their daughter.

After another tough pregnancy, LittleE was born happy and healthy. Within months of her birth, HotMama and D ended up moving back to California, but this time to the northern portion. D is still passing his tests to finalize all of his schooling efforts. But this hardworking couple is a reminder to me that, no matter the road block, if you lean on each other and stick together, anything is possible.

I guess they help remind me that love really DOES conquer all.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

30 left til' 30...

On January 16th, 2010, I'll turn 30 years old, so as of today, there are officially 30 days left until I hit 30.

I will admit, I'm going through a bit of a panic. I'm not really losing my head completely, but there is usual, "OMG, I'm almost 1/3rd of the way through my life and I'm not where I'd like to be yet! Is it ever gonna happen?" It's a bit of a challenging time, but I'm sure I'll come out just fine on the other end.

So I was thinking of how to work this into a blogging challenge.

And I think I figured it out.

Each day, I'll try to blog about someone inspirational in my life, as well as a fear I have (if I even have 30 of them) and something I'm grateful for (I know I'll have more than 30 of those)!

I think there is a definate difference between a woman turning 30 and a man turning 30. Sure, both genders have things we want to accomplish in our lives, but men can have childeren will into their later years. Women have a bit more of a time clock on such things and let me tell you -it's not just a quiet "tick tick tick", like I once thought. I once thought it was completely psychological, but now I know better. It's a very real screeching interal alarm clock.

Fear: In my case, the alarm clock probably has to do with being surrounded by men and women with families, and a number of my co-workers are happily baby-baking at the office. I'm not one to linger in self-pity for long, but sometimes I wonder "what if". Since I'm an aging PCOS patient, my chances of the natural way are pretty much nill as I round into the 30's, but...

Gratitude:I'm eternally grateful of having adoption been put on my heart some time ago. Truly realizing what makes up a "family" has nothing to do with bloodlines is something I'm deeply grateful for. When I think if my family I think immediately of the people who chose to take me in and love me and who continue to help me every day. There is no way I could repay them for all the years of help, nurturing, love, and guidance. And the thought of being able to someday give that back to someone is staggeringly beautiful. It's something I've craved for years now. While I plan on enjoying my time as a single gal, I look foward to settling in with a partner who is as invested in that vision of a family as I am.

Inspirational person of the day:


If you asked me to describe him in one word, it would be hands down "quirky".

I met him in 2006. He was my dance partner in a local community theater production of Guys and Dolls. He put up wonderfully with my two left feet (which have since gained some sense of how to dance but it's been a slow process) and was very kind to me. He said I was one of his first platonic friends in the area, and I do consider him like family.

Let me go into his quirkiness a bit. He's a vegatarian, and, at last check, drove a beat up old Mercedes. And I mean beat up. If it rained, his seats were wet. He converted it to run partially on frying oil. He patched that car up more times than I can count just in the 2 years I've known him, but he's never been against a little elbow grease. He's the guy that brings the vegatarian dish to the party and still manages to be the life of it at times.

He's been inspirational to me in that he dares to be different and really get out there and live life. He has a hunger for life and does everything he can to feed that hunger. He's not afraid to adopt into his life causes he believes in, but does it in such a manner that it seems completely natural.

He pushed my limits and encouraged me to get out of the house and off my butt. Together we did a little mountain biking, hiked trails. He has a great way about him of finding new, fun things to do, and I found it a reliefe (as I'm usually the "social director" when it comes to my friends). He's very community oriented and never boring. He's always willing to try something new and rarely complains.

He seems to have a great grasp on what's really important in life. Something about his gentle manner has always been a quiet cattle prod for me. He's a great combination of an adventurer's spirit with a heart of gold. He's one of those friends who, while he's never said it, I know I can call for whatever and if he can, he'll be there. Hell, once he helped me with a bunch of yard work for the reward of pizza and beer! It's a comfort to know he's on my side.

Even though he's moved away, I still smile when I think of our friendship and miss him like a brother.

A Holiday Challenge for Bloggers and Readers!

Christmas is nearly upon us and I'm not quite set with any sort of wish list. The things I want most this year can't magically appear under any tree.

But since we're all a little strapped this year, I realized that this is the perfect year for a challenge that bloggers and readers can cash in on!

Every community does something special for the holidays. My community of Escondido had an Art Walk last weekend, a lighting ceremony of our downtown area, horse-drawn carriage rides, and a small red mail box where kids can drop off letters to Santa (and receive replies). While I checked out the Art Walk, it was raining and that put a damper (like that pun?) on the other activities.

So here's the challenge -
Find an event in your community, or a community near you that is free or under $15. Participate!

Watching another small city's Christmast Parade may not sound thrilling, but you might be surprised at some of the memories you'll make by expanding your mind a bit. In 2007, I took a road trip up to Solvang, California (a little Dutch community nestled in the hills of California) and watched their small town Christmas parade. Ya know what? It was really fun, cute, and an unexpected highlight of that trip.

So check out something new, blog, or post a comment about what you did, where it was, and all tha jazz. Photos are highly recommended! I have plans myself, but you'll have to wait and see what I end up doing.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Roasted Bear tour 2009- Kouzzina Dining Review

I've heard a lot of mixed reviews about Cat Cora's new eatery in Disney's Boardwalk Resort. My travel companion (Sistah' Girl) is a fan of the Food network and was excited to try it, but after the many negative reviews, I'll admit, I was hesitant. So we compromised and decided to try out an early breakfast - rather than tempt the negative lunch and dinner reviews.

Afterall, we had limited budget and limited calories to play with.

Well, breakfast turned out to be a raging success! Not only was it probably the best meal we had, it also was the best value, we had on property during our entire stay. What a great surprise!

We arrived early, around 8:30am, and were seated immediately. There were only two other groups in the restruant at that time, which was pleasant and a great way to start off a relaxing morning. Since we tour commando style, sit down meals are a life (and feet) saver. The more relaxing they can be, the better.

So we were on a limited diet and budget. That made it VERY difficult to select from the menu! Everything looked amazing, but we knew that we couldn't afford to order everything. So here's what we went with:

Entree -

Spinach, Tomato, and Feta Scrambled Eggs (includes Breakfast Potatoes, and a choice of chicken sausage or bacon) $10.50

Side Orders -
French Toast
(made with Challah bread)
Blueberry Orange Pancakes (2)

Substitutions -
Sweet Potato Hash
instead of Breakfast potatoes on entree

Overall - the meal was great! Our waitress was great, and kept the coffee, hot tea, and water coming. We made it clear we wanted to try several things, but were on a restricted diet and couldn't eat 2 full entrees. We split the one entree and sides. She did charge us an bit extra than normal for the Blueberry Orange Pancakes, but it was completely worth it.

Overall, our breakfast cost us about $25 (excluding tip) but as you can see from the smiles, we left very satisified customers and will definately be back someday to enjoy this one again.

Observations: Guests who eat during peak meal periods may find this to be an unpleasant experience, if they are looking for a relaxing dining experience. As the place filled, it got very very noisy very very quickly. There are no tapestries to speak of and the sound just echos like crazy. Also, we must have arrived as they were recieving or preparing fish for the evening. Though it didn't smell like fish in the restruant, it did in the entry lobby, rather strongly. However, this may not be the norm. I would suggest breakfast though, the earlier the better! Since we were seated immediately, it wasn't bothersome. Also, the bathrooms were surprisingly small for a place this size. But again, all these pitfalls can be avoided by dining off peak hours.

An update and my first Blog Award!

First, the Update:

I had a meeting with my landlords this weekend and I'm happy to report that it turned out very positive. They were happy to find the place in rather well kept by me. After seeing my concerns first hand, they were convinced to go with my handyman's estimate to get the work done. Saddly, the shed isn't part of the deal. It's going to have to be demolished - as it would cost more to fix it than the shed is worth.

So it's a bit of a winning situation. I'll just have to find a new way to store the stuff that was out there. Not that big of a deal though. Just means re-working the closet a bit. Afterall, I probably won't have access to a shed to store things when it comes to moving into an apartment w/ a roomie anyway, right? Might as well get the warm up for it now!

Now, on to the Blog Award!

This came from Being Carly and it's very cute. Not to mention, it'll give me a chance to endorss my fellow bloggers (and get them blogging more often because I always look forward to reading them).

So, here's the deal. As a recipient of this award, I'm supposed to list 10 things that make me happy (at least one of which I've done today). So, here goes!

1. Laugh with girl friend's about something silly.
2. Snuggling up with my pup on the couch.
3. Drinking a cup of a fabulous tea or other hot beverage.
4. Being a good friend.
5. Sleeping in when good dreams abound.
6. Watching a favorite movie on a stormy night.
7. Walking through Disneyland at night (even better, during the holidays at night!)
8. The gratitude of an audience.
9. Laughter of those I love.
10. Thoughtfulness.

I'm supposed to link 10 blogs that I enjoy to this as well, so, here goes:
Being Carly
The Voice of...
The Less Than Domestic Goddess
Running to Disney
Elena's Life in Motion
A Disney Wedding

So sad to say I have yet to follow 10 blogs consistantly, but I like to actually read each entry on each one and be sure I give fellow bloggers the gift of actually paying attention to this crazy stuff we write. ;)

Happy Holidays!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Starting Off a December Morning Righ

This morning, the dog woke me up at 6am. That feels awefully early on a weekend, but when you start it off with a Muppet Christmas movie (Letters to Santa) and news that Boys to Men are back in force, it's hard to be a grump.

Hope you all have a great pre Christmas weekend!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

The Vacation and the Cave-In

Needless to say, Sistah' Girl and I had a trip to remember at Disneyworld earlier this month. It was amazing! Filled with lots of great moments, laughter filled (and even a few tearful ones - in good ways). More about that on the Disney blog, but we couldn't be more grateful for the time away from the high stress medical world we both work in. And we couldn't have done it w/o all the help from our families. THANK YOU MOMS and DADS!

I came home to a mountain of work at the office and at home, but with a renewed spirit.
Unforunately, the high from the vacation didn't bouy me as long as I had hoped it would, but I'd like to think that short respite still helps me maintain a focus on my goals. Yes, it's very clear that I do need to change career fields. Instead of being normally irritated with work, I found myself deeply unhappy when I returned. Dont' get me wrong, I'm terribly grateful to have paycheck. In fact, next week I'll be studying to renew my certification and traveling to Arizona to take a necessary test (thank God for Dad's graciousness with his of frequent flier miles and their support in getting my certification fixed!). But I'm reminded that I need to continually work to get my financial situation a bit more flexible - and that still means moving in with a roommate and throwing myself into the whirlwind that is the writing and theatrical world. It's actually exciting, but I know there is a long road ahead of me to get there. And I won't lie. That is scary. I like things to go according to plan (though they often don't). But I was reminded of the saying, "What's the worst that can happen? Will I be eaten by wolves? No? Okay then. Nothing THAT bad can happen."

I know I have the support of those that truly love me to get me through. Let me tell you, that support is indispensable, even to an uber independent woman like me. No one reaches a goal alone!

That said - my land lord has impeccable timing...

This Saturday, she's coming out to take a look at a list of repairs I got an estimate on last month. And now, I'll be able to add another thing to the list.
Below is a picture of my storage shed. I know it's a bit dark, but you should still be able to make out unplanned sky light that happened from the last rain. In fact, I'm pretty sure if you walked on the roof, your foot would go right through.
In that shed was camping equipment, childhood stuffed toys from my childhood, and Christmas decorations. I got off work early to spend some daylight getting the junk out before the rain hit again last night, and thankfully, most of the important stuff was salvagable.

I did find a box of things from my previous marriage. Not a big box. Not even a full box. But just a box of pictures. And ya know what? Two thoughts struck me.
#1) "Isn't a bride supposed to be most beautiful on her wedding day? I look like an awkward kid. I'm so much more confident and happy with my apperance on-an-everyday basis now than I was then." Wow! I guess I've come a long way!"
#2) "Who would have thought that 6 years and 'forever' would fit into a box?"
I have mostly positive memories of being married, and I'm grateful for that. We had some great times, but I'm glad one of us realized that we weren't the love of each other's lives and freed us up to go and seek that happiness.

Sometimes it's great to be reminded that we're not defective. We're just all people - imperfect and beautiful in our own ways, each of us healing from something and capable of great love in the mean time. I realized a long time ago that getting divorced was part of my journey, and that difficult experience helped make me the confident woman that I am today. And, at the risk of sounding pompous, I like me.

Anyway, everything was a good reminder that all we truly have, despite our best laid plans, is the moment we're in. That every "forever" will eventually come down to the name on a headstone or a cardboard box. As Scrooge learned, it's how we treat our fellow man that makes all the difference in this life.

My challenge this year?
Find a way to Pay it Foreward.

Monday, November 30, 2009

The Orphaned Christmas - The Choice

(Ready for the 2007 Holiday Season)

With my trip right around the corner, I'm blaring Christmas music in my ears here at work and giving a lot of thought to my favorite holiday, Christmas Eve!

In the past years, I've thrown a dinner for family in friends. Sometimes my family comes. Sometimes it's just friends. I guess until recently I never really pondered what it would mean to spend it flying solo. In fact, last year, when Sistah'Girl flew down, turned out to be the best Christmas Eve in a long time! Lots of fun!

But this year, that looks like flying solo is exactly what is in the cards. Due to schedules and other factors, I've been made aware that Christmas Eve company at the Lake House will be tough to come by this year.

So this year, I'm finding the bright side to throwing Christmas Eve, Orphan Style!

Now, I can see why single folks living alone often don't decorate for Christmas. Especially women. We often see marriage and starting our own brood to be a 'right of passage', and a holiday centered around romance, magic, and children can just be a grim reminder that we haven't attained that 'right' yet. Well, I was married. No kids (sh! Don't tell Clydas he's not officially a kid), but I've spend Christmases since with kids and families. This year, I'll be flying solo for this night. So, what to do with my Orphaned Christmas Eve?

I know that, instead of cooking my traditional lamb feast, putting up a tree and decorating it, there are places I could go, but I refuse to let my little world feel less like Christmas just because I'll be flying solo. Afterall, I've never let that slow me down before! I did the Triathlon w/o the support of a romantic interest. I don't stop being me and enjoying the things I enjoy just because I'm not able to share it with a lover.

While there are still a few weeks until Christmas, I think I can definately see myself enjoying the tree I've decorated, a fire in the fireplace, some candelight, some soft Christmas music.... I'm relaxed already just envisioning it. As for activities? Christmas movies, maybe a Church service (I may have to work this day, so that may not pan out), working on a scrap book from my recent Disneyworld vacation (Roasted Bear Tour 2009), and/or making a list of all the good stuff I'm grateful for in my life right now and give God the glory for it. Afterall, all of my Christmas Eves won't be this relaxed forever.

Christmas morning I'll spend with my family, just like always.

So what does all this lead to?

I have a very clear choice in this case - I can be a bitter, miserable almost 30 divorcee w/o help decorating or celebrating my favorite holiday by myself. Or I can see this as a new adventure and a chance to really enjoy the peace, magic, and spirit of the season.

And well, bitter just isn't my color.

Revelation of the Week: We can't always control the scenery, but we can certainly control the climate.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Thanksgiving weekend Review

I have a feeling this December is absolutely going to fly by, so I better get a quick Thanksgiving review up here.

This year was actually another really good year. That's a three year streak for me. Crazy! Could this be the start of somethin' good? Only time can tell!

Anyway, I went to coffee and a movie with my parents (The Christmas Carol in IMAX 3D). It was my second time seeing this amazing film and I love it and already can't wait to own it! It'll help set the perfect tone for Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party day later this week! (Sign up to follow the Disney Files blog for more information on that, and a review upon returning!)

We then took the dog for a nice long walk for about an hour or so. It was a beautiful 80 degree day. Dinner was great (provided by Whole Foods), and that pretty much wrapped up the day. I started catching a cold, unforunately.

But, it didn't stop me from hanging out with BioDad and Lil'Sis the next day at the Wild Animal Park!

It was a fun day overall, however my cold really go the better of me by the end of the day. I spent most of Saturday and Sunday recouping, and doing my best to get things prepped for the trip (including my health). So far, I'm almost ready. I started getting packed, but I still have one more day - though most of that will be taken up by working. Yikes! I think tomorrow night will be a late one!

Hope you all had a great one!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Thanksgiving Eve, 2009 -Something to bring to the table.



  “Have something to bring to the table. It will make you more welcome.” – Randy Pausch


Dear readers (ye brave, ye few), I have a confession to make.

Thanksgiving is probably my LEAST favorite holiday. I can’t say I hate it anymore, but it’s my least favorite holiday.

Why is it my least favorite holiday?

Well, while I see the value in families that don’t often see one another, gathering for a meal, that’s never really been in the case in my family. I’ve lived in the same town my entire life.

At this point, I had been married less than a year and my then-husband didn’t have any idea why I disliked Thanksgiving so much. I told him it’s because I feel like I was just taking up a seat at the table, that I was almost always talked over, not listened to, and that’s the type of behavior from people who just don’t care. I know my family loves me, but sometimes the ones we love with take for granted the most.


Anyway at the time, he thought I was being oversensitive, and surely I’d be missed if I wasn’t there.

Feeling the need to make my point, early in the dinner, one of my parents had asked me a question. And, well, here’s how that conversation unfolded.

“So, J, how’s that rehearsal for that show going. What’s it about again?” someone dear to me asked.

“Oh! It’s going really well, but I’m driving myself crazy,” by this time, the person who had asked the question is already paying attention to someone else entirely and no longer listening to me at all, so I continue, “trying to write these 15 songs for the show. I have to sing 10 of them. And then a gigantic pink elephant walked into the room and sat on the couch. It had polka dots and everything.”

No one at the table laughed.

No one at the table was listening.

I looked over at my then-husband and his eyes were wide. Now he understood.

So what’s the greatest gift you can give someone this Thanksgiving? Be present with them. If you ask a question, wait to get the full answer. Remember that common courtesy isn’t so common anymore. You never know who’s had the same experience I had, and who’ll appreciate it.

Why do I not hate it anymore?

A few years back, I ended up having a low key Thanksgiving, with just me and one other person, dancing in the kitchen as we made a small dinner, watching different marathons on TV… Yeah – that’s my kind of Thanksgiving.

What is happening with me this year for Thanksgiving?

A long bike ride or a hike in the morning, followed by dinner and maybe a movie with my parents.

This year, I’m thankful for a low key Thanksgiving.


Monday, November 23, 2009

You know you need a vacation when...

You know you need a vacation when:

You're stressing out about all the stuff you have to get done before you can leave.

You're looking at the menu for Starbucks and thinking, "That $3.50 I could spend on a latte could be 1/4th of the way to a Disney pin on my vacation..."

You can't wait to shut your cell phone down for a week.

You're excited that you have a dog sitter that you can pay in pizza.

You're relieved to have a reliable ride to and from the airport.

You're contemplating what clothes that you aren't packing that you can wear on the plane.

You're trying to pencil time in with people before you leave for your trip.

You're pushing aside the bit of drama in your life because you know you'll be able to think clearer and deal with it AFTER the vacation.

You're picturing photo ops you want.

You're already wondering if you have enough stuff to scrap book the trip.

You'er figuring out how to eat anything perishable in your fridge in a week w/o blowing your diet.

You're wondering if you should get any new clothes for the trip...especially a swimsuit...

You're figuring out the legistics of bringing an extra bag just for momentos.


Tuesday, November 17, 2009

What's new? A LOT!

Today I find myself giddy about my upcoming Disneyworld Trip. It's the first time since 2005, and the first time ever without a romantic interest (or immediate family) along. So I can't wait.

That said, I realized that there are a lot of great, new things coming my way right now. Lots of options to act on. It's just a matter of making the necessary sacrifies, and following my heart.

So what's the new stuff?

Sunday I tried a new church I think I might just stick with. It's call TheMovement and is a non-denominational Christian church with lots to offer in my area as far as meeting new folks. Since a majority of my friends have moved away, it's time to start over and make a friendship base here once again. Now, that doesn't mean that I've forgotten those that migrated elsewhere. In fact, quite the opposite! I look forward to visiting and sending out care packages whenever I can! But it would be great to have more folks to join into the holiday party fun and all that. Right now, I'm not sure if I'll have enough folks to do the Holiday Murder Mystery party this year!

It's also located right next to some of my favorite coffee shops and brunch places, so I can see myself catching a service and then heading over to one of those places to spend a peaceful Sunday morning/afternoon.

I'm working more and more towards connecting w/ folks I have something in common with. Case in point - The blogger meet up! Me, Carly, and Luis pictured below.
Safe to say, a great time was had by all and I certainly wouldn't mind running into any of them at the parks again someday soon. It felt like meeting old friends.

I'm seriously contemplating writing a book. Yup, that's right - a book. Not a poetry book (though God knows I have enough of those to fill SEVERAL books). Not a fantasy book (though, again, I've got enough material there to go for days). I'm thinking of co-writing a Disneyland Guide book. Crazy, I know, because there are already several out there, but this one will have a unique spin. Disney for Dieters. Yes, you can splurge on vacation, and still not fall completely off the weight-loss band wagon. It was actually an idea of MickeyMan, but it's a great idea none-the-less and I believe there is definately a market for such things. Afterall, I've been to Disneyland several times and managed to treat myself w/o coming back heavier than when I left! It'll be an interesting research project, so we'll see.
I may have found a reliable roommate that wouldn't mind living w/ me and Clydas. I'm still having trouble letting go of where I am now, however I see more and more how splitting the rent would help me be able to spend more time working towards my goals (acting, singing, traveling, writing) and waste less and less time in a feild that I apperciate, but don't particularly have an affection for. We'll see what comes of this as Sistah' Girl and I have been tossing around ideas to move out of state, but that would take saving up a significant amount of dough anyway, so we'll see!

So we'll see how things move along. It's so easy for me to lose focus with all I'm interested in, but I know that I'll just keep spinning my wheels until I'm willing to accept me for who I am and make the changes necessary to "keep moving forward."

Happy fall, ya'll!

2012 - A review

Opening day, I was treated to see the movie 2012.

I haven't really been terribly jazzed about seeing the movie, but if there is one thing I'm always down for, it's being exposed to new and different things. In that aspect, I truly inherited my parent's love of the arts, even if it's not something I would have normally considered.

So that said, there was one reason I was looking forward to seeing this movie. I love John Cusack. Ever since "Gross Pointe Blank", I decided I love this actor. Not only does he look strikingly like a guy I had a crush on in my youth, he also has that intense, yet comic way about him. It's almost an awkward "every man" style that I enjoy in his acting (even when I haven't cared for the movie).

However, I have to say, I really enjoyed the movie and can't wait to see it with my family. I would definately suggest sticking to the 13 and up age range, as it does have some very intense moments, and a fair amount of adult themes.

It was a fun ride! Yes, it was HEAVILY laden with special effects, but what you do you expect?! It's a DISASTER movie about the earth's crust up and moving.

It wasn't so much of a human drama as it was an edge of your seat roller coaster ride. Well edited, it barely gave you time to breathe between disasters. The cliche moments gave it a bit of levity, which was necessary to make it overall palettable.

I'd highly recommend seeing this one in the theaters. Saddly, it will not hold up on a small screen.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Turning 6!

If you've kept up with the blog you'll know that I'm adopted and have a good relationship with my biological family, as well as the family that raised me.
Well - since I have a BIG family (including all of those people) I feel the need to give a nod to my little sister!
We have yet to have too many adventures together, and I've yet to introduce my favorite places (Disneyland/Disneyworld) to her, as she lives in Northern CA and I live in Southern CA, But here's a nod to the growing girl!

In fact, depending what group you lump me into, I'm either the youngest, the oldest, or an only child. How many people can say that, eh? ;)

So, here are a few moments where I'm "the oldest". Charlie turned 6 this past week!
I still remember being super excited when I found out she was on her way. I wish I were closer (or had the capability to see her more than every couple of years).
Yes, you can all bet that the first chance I get, we're goin' to Disneyland! It's amazing how life changes you. I am now looking forward to the millions of trips on It's a Small World....

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Overcoming Social Anxiety

You'd probably never think that someone in theater, who shares as much as I do on a blog, is a fairly reserved person. But the more you get to know me, the more you'll discover that it's true.

This past Saturday, I met with Blogger Girl and a bunch of her fellow blogging and real life friends. Being over an hour late, I was seriously considering just taking my chances of finding them in the park, but I decided to stop by the restruant we were supposed to be meeting at.

To my surprise, they were still there! So I took a deep breath, walked in, and said hi.

Even more to my surprise, the awkwardness didn't last more than a few moments and then it felt like sitting around with old friends.

Afterwards, I treated myself to a Mocha from my favorite lounge in the Grand Californian hotel. Sitting down by the fire in the lobby, I took a few moments to shut down from the incredibly stressful week, and unwind.

It had me thinking, "I don't do this very often anymore." A little self-reflection never hurt anyone, and it reminded me how many labels and stigmas from childhood tend to stick around, if we believe 'em.

As a child, most people would say I was quiet. I was that tall quiet kid. However, when you got me around a group of my friends, I was usually the social director. To this day, some of that has really stuck. I can still find a myraid of free, fun, cheap, or different things to do. I enjoy it! And I've never let the fact that I am often flying solo to such events stop me from going ahead anyway.

Also, the "quiet tall kid" stigma has still stuck a bit as well. But maybe it's just something I've come to believe about myself that isn't necessarily true? I've never been "the life of the party" type, but over the past several years, I've gotten out of my shell and shattered this quite a bit. And I'm pretty proud of that.

While I was sitting there, a few older couples came over and took up some of the other seats. One particular couple was working together on a crossword puzzle until the wife fell asleep and the husband worked on it quietly to himself. It was heart warming.

Another couple sat down near by, probably in their 50's, sat down, enjoying a glass of wine each and some snacks. They held hands, talked quietly, and then fell silent, watching the flames and enjoying the moment together.

In watching these others, and delving into a little self-reflection, I'm reminded that life is good. My life especially. I have a job that allows me to live on my own, family that is there for me whenever I need 'em, a few friends I can call no matter what, and the ability to zip up to Disneyland when I need to hit the "reset" button on my stress-o-meter. Yes, the romantic peice still hasn't slid into place. But I know, like that glass of wine the couple was sharing or the comfort that came from the puzzle couple, such things can not be rushed.

As I eventually finished my drink and rose from the fire, I was reminded that everything happens when it's supposed to, and filled with a feeling of peace, and hope.

Monday, November 9, 2009

A Big Girl Blog And Breaking the Curse

Sistah' Girl: "Ya know, I just relealized something. And this is going to sound weird."

Me: "Oh yeah? Well, disclaimer noted. What's up?"

Sistah' Girl: "I'm smaller now than I was at your wedding."

Me: "That's funny. I'm smaller now than I was at my wedding too!" Which was 8 years go.
(Above photo from 2005 WDW trip)

In 19 days, I'll be meeting Sistah' Girl in MCO (Orlando International Airport, for those of you who aren't travel savy). We've been planning and dreaming of this trip so long, it felt like it was never going to happen, and here it is, knocking (dare I say, pounding) at the door.

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I'm not looking forward to it. In fact, quite the opposite! But I don't think it's really going to sink in that "we're going" until I get on that plane marking the last leg to Orlando. (Then, no doubt, it will continue to sink in for the first couple days!)

Now, Sistah' Girl and I have always been "big girls". And to some extent, we've each taken pride in the 'privledges' that allows. Being a bigger girl, you feel less attractive to men so it's far easier to become 'one of the guys'. In fact, most of my friends growing up have been male. I've been blessed to have some fabulous guy friends in my life. People also expect you to be down for whatever when it comes to food. They seem to inately realize that you're not going to go to a diner and find nothing to eat.

It took a couple years of marriage (and a game of racketball) for my ex husband to realize, "You're a big girl, but you don't let it slow you down."

Nothing could be more true. I could pack it away and throw down! I know that's something Sistah' Girl and I have always had in common (even though I think she's always been a bit more girly than me).

Well, now a lot of that has changed.

Don't get me wrong! I can still throw down like nobody's business! Anyone who has done the theme park commando thing knows this first hand!


I can't pack it away anymore. It's actually uncomfortable. I no longer feel pride in grabbing the last bite of something, or cleaning my own plate.

So this Disneyworld trip will be very different for us.
*We're both well under 200lbs now.
*It's our first official Roasted Bear Tour.
*We'll be thinner than we've ever seen one another.
*We'll be staying off property (new for me)
*We'll be breaking the Disneyworld Curse.
(For those not in-the-know, this is the Disneyworld Curse: Between 1999 and 2005, I've
been to Disneyworld with 5 people - each of whom I considered the closest people in the world to me and whom I assumed I'd be forever friends with at the very least. Well, due to choices made by them or me, none of them are a part of my life anymore. While I will always cherish those memories made with those people, and I don't regret a moment of what we shared, things change, and sometimes we have to let those we love go. However, it's a streak I'd rather not continue if I have any say about it. So Sistah' Girl and I think we have pretty good odds at breaking that curse. Afterall, we've put up with each other for over 15 years as it is! )
*We'll be celebrating an up-coming year of new dreams to dream and world's to rock. ;)

Saturday, November 7, 2009

The not-so-finer things in life...

Yes, this has been a trying week, but sometimes all it takes is good conversation, a nice hot beverage, and a big fireplace to make life look prestine again.

Thanks blogger-buds for giving me the excuse to get the hell outta dodge.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Outrage and Timing

“To be angry is easy. But to be angry at the right men, and at the right time, and for the right reason…This is difficult.” – Armand Assante, The Odyssey.

A conversation with Sistah’ Girl the other day reminded me that everything in life has (and needs) a certain amount of timing to it. For example, you can’t rush baking bread. The bread will blacken on the outside and not cook completely through if you crank up the head the try to rush it. Life is much the same way. You can’t force a plant to grow any faster than it’s intended speed. You can provide it tools and nutrients to help it along, but that’s about all you can do. The plant will do what it’s going to do. The maturing of people isn’t so different – I think.

I’ve learned in my life that sometimes, with emotions, timing is everything as well.

For example, I’ve known many couples who got engaged about 6 months into dating. While my old fashioned self feels that’s awefully fast, I also recognize that there is a window of time when both people are madly in love and ready to commit their lives to one another – and if that window passes with no action taken, it can often lead to uncertainty about the relationship, rather than a “We’re committed to one another. Let’s work through this,” mentality that can often come w/ those who deeply value to commitment of marriage. Sometimes that “window” comes early on. Sometimes it doesn’t come for years.

Another great example is in conflict.
Whenever we’re involved in conflict, we have the choice on how to react to the anger we’re confronted by.
If we’re confronted with someone’s anger, and we’ve legitimately wronged them – a sincere apology at that point can quickly put out the flames.
But if that apology is prolonged in coming, it risks damaging the relationship beyond repair and/or escalating.

I’m not one to get angry easily. If I can let it slide or explain it away, I will (sometimes, admittedly, even to my detriment). My timing with an apology when I’ve wronged someone is as quickly (and sincerely) as possible – and always includes making amends. Very rarely does my anger when wronged escalate to outrage.

I’ve always liked that quote by Aristotle (which was paraphrased by Armand Assante in one of my all-time-favorite mini series). It’s all about emotions, and timing in expressing them.

As they say, sometimes “Timing is everything”.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Halloween at the office

That's me, under Elphaba's skin on the left. (This photo is my favorite because I didn't know what my co-worker was doing on the other side of the portable wall. I was just told "Cast a Spell", so I did!)
At a friend's Halloween party last year. I was going for "black bird". You can't see the feathers in my hair or my giant black feathered wings in this photo.

The "black bird" was actually a punt, after I realized that people no longer read anything aside from blogs or e-mails.

My original costume last year?
Well, that was a specific black bird...
"Quoth the ________....Nevermore...."

This year I was too busy to think up anything new, so I'm revisiting Elphaba. So far so good!