Another Shark Week in Paradise

It's 11pm and the house is quiet, aside from the white noise of fans and the exaggerated snoring of my beloved Clydas. Just a few minutes ago, I was finally able to brush my teeth and trade the sweat-smelling banana-mash-smeared work clothes for flannel pj shorts and an oversized Eleiko shirt I got for free at a Weightlifting meet a few years ago.

We canceled an upcoming trip to California, opting to post pone it until the early winter, but it's still great to have something to look forward to. Someone recently commented to me that tag team parenting is great for saving on child care costs, but tough on a marriage. They aren't necessarily wrong. We haven't had anything I can call a date since February, but we're soaking up time with the Beanie Girl while she's still, well, Beanie. With her one yeat birthday right around the corner (how did THAT happen?!?) She's in a stage where she's changing leaps and bounds, so it's nice to experience all those firsts.

It was a fantastic treat to join my weightlifting buddies on Sunday on a workout that left me (literally) dizzy for a good while. I got to be me for a few hours, with no demands that the mom version of me do anything  (other than hurry home when I was done). Interestingly enough, I was hopeful that pregnancy would be the cure to the PCOS and Endometriosis, but the workout reminded me that the hug of barbed wire still can randomly strike at any time. But I got through it, none the less.

Caged

It is HARD not to compete right now. I won't lie. It's very tough to have my personal goals be more obscure - especially when I have so many hardworking folks in my roster that I get to help reach their very specific goals. Right now, I'm working out 3 days a week, and 1 of them (at least) is a babywearing Metabolic Conditioner - which is fine for keeping me strong, but isn't helping me get through a structured program and getting me closer to getting back in fighting shape. Last time I competed (even pregnant), I was lifting 5-6 days a week. Not 2-3.  So it's been a bit of a challenge to find a new, maintainable goal. It may be (gulp) running, as soon as we get the jogging stroller hand-me-down cleaned up and functional, and when we get a more breathable baby wearing carrier for the summer time.

But, as the Lady in Grey reminded me, this is 'only a season'. Beanie Girl will only be, well, Beanie for a short time, so having limited child care is kind of a blessing. It ensures we get time together (while not spending half of my income on babysitting) and helps us build memories. She may not remember her first time at the beach...

Island Lake Park - First Day at the beach

but My Sailor and I will.

She may not remember going to the zoo 
and she probably thinks that the people are more of an attraction than the animals,

but we got to see her wonder at aquariums.

She may not remember playing in the park mid-day on a week day, but we'll remember. I'll remember working 6 days a week (7 if you count paperwork) in a job I love, while sneaking in quality time with my family every chance I got.

I'll remember it all 10 years from now.

What I won't remember is that I was only able to lift when I had the available child care hours (no babies on the weight floor allowed at the Y).

I won't remember that I took over a year off of competing. I won't remember that I was more than occasionally thwarted in my plans by my growing obligations on the home front.

There will be lots of competitions in my future, I'm sure. As tough as it is to watch them float by as I fulfill other roles life has had for me beyond athlete and beyond coach, I know it's something I won't regret.

Life isn't anything like I expected it to be, as 40 becomes closer than my 30's -

 But that's what happens when the Impossible becomes Possible.