This week I was able to make some giant leaps in getting our financial house in order. Since My Sailor's job entails leaving at a moment's notice, I really wanted to simplify things as much as possible. It was completely selfish. I'll have one less thing to think about when we get that fateful phone call. Simplifying our finances is helping out a bunch, especially as our roomie is (possibly)preparing to move out this month. I didn't want the loss of rent to impact our lives too much. (We might not be getting another roommate soon - if we opt to get another one at all.) Setting up automated payments from the correct accounts so I don't have to worry about doing the bank account shuffle a couple times a month has been a huge help.
Gained peace of mind and nickels and dimes. Both add up to awesome.
I've also been simplifing my schedule. It's really helpful for me to keep a calendar. When I first started in the arts (music and theater), I couldn't be expected to be anywhere on time. Well, about a decade ago, I realized what a lousy way that is to live - constantly rushing, never considered reliable, etc. So I started keeping a calendar. It's proven to be really helpful. If I write something down by hand, there is some sort of extra commitment or investment there, whether it's "trash day" or my work schedule. Some folks have noted how committed I am to work outs and training and things like that. In fact, working out seems to have the most marks on my calendar- see all the orange ones?
The funny thing is, now that I'm J 2.0 - the more responsible version, I clearly notice how so many others in my circle, well, aren't. I mean, things come up and we all duck out of things last minute, but the sheer amount of times it seems to happen to me is down right astounding! In fact, it's happened so often, I should probably think it's something about me. I mean, we all come across circumstances when we have to cancel or change plans at the last minute. We're all late sometimes. It's part of being human, and, in general, completely forgivable. Recently I stumbled across Single Dad Laughing's Blog and was reminded that to get friends, be one. The rest will work itself out.
Sometimes the pace of life just runs away with us.
My Sailor and I are far from immune.
We're putting a pin in some of the bigger discussions around the house right now.
We're discussing the possibility of further construction, international travel, and the whole family planning peice.
But not right now.
With My Sailor's schedule, it's nearly impossible to tackle big topics that require input from both of us. My Sailor gets about 10 hours at home every day. Those aren't "waking hours". That includes sleeping time, getting ready for work, meal time, and down time - so it realistically turns into only about 2-3 hours of 'waking hours' a night.
He doesn't get weekends.
He has 1 day off per week most of the time, and a lot of that is spent sleeping, running errands, and squeezing in some fun. Days off don't include late nights - even a day off must end early enough for him to get sleep so he can be up around 3am to get to work on time the next day.
That means that anything that involves really serious discussion that can wait - does.
Should we get an estimate for the construction? Let's decide in the fall.
Should we foster or go international or go private for our adoption? Should we just foster? hould we even have kids at all?! Maybe we'll just be great aunts and uncles, and babysitters for friends? Should I just get rid of my problematic girlie parts all together? Let's talk about it in the fall. Maybe the schedule will loosen up and give us a better idea of what makes sense for us. 'Cuase I have ZERO desire to be over 35 and just figuring this stuff out. Hell, by my age, my mom was working on her master's degree, working full time, raising my brother and I who were over 10! I'm still working on turing writing into something profitable.
What are we doing for our next vacation? When should we take it? Let's talk about it in the fall, when we know what our money looks like. If we decide to do construction on the house, we should probably save our dough...
I won't lie... it's a damn good thing I'm pretty independent. My Sailor actually enjoys being part of our family dynamic and he participates completely whenever he's available. When he's not though, I have a network of friends and family members I can call for support, the smarts to know how to get the positive endorphines burning, and the courage to ask for help when I need it.
But sometimes, ya know, I hate that damn bulletin board.
Gained peace of mind and nickels and dimes. Both add up to awesome.
I've also been simplifing my schedule. It's really helpful for me to keep a calendar. When I first started in the arts (music and theater), I couldn't be expected to be anywhere on time. Well, about a decade ago, I realized what a lousy way that is to live - constantly rushing, never considered reliable, etc. So I started keeping a calendar. It's proven to be really helpful. If I write something down by hand, there is some sort of extra commitment or investment there, whether it's "trash day" or my work schedule. Some folks have noted how committed I am to work outs and training and things like that. In fact, working out seems to have the most marks on my calendar- see all the orange ones?
 |
| Yes, I have a unicorn calendar. Ya know why? Because I couldn't find a Disney one I liked. Yes, I'm 5. |
The funny thing is, now that I'm J 2.0 - the more responsible version, I clearly notice how so many others in my circle, well, aren't. I mean, things come up and we all duck out of things last minute, but the sheer amount of times it seems to happen to me is down right astounding! In fact, it's happened so often, I should probably think it's something about me. I mean, we all come across circumstances when we have to cancel or change plans at the last minute. We're all late sometimes. It's part of being human, and, in general, completely forgivable. Recently I stumbled across Single Dad Laughing's Blog and was reminded that to get friends, be one. The rest will work itself out.
Sometimes the pace of life just runs away with us.
 |
"You know what... It's a fair question. Let's do this. Let's put a pin in it! Boop! Pin in, there you go. Now let's that hang there a bit and then we'll address that, when we've thought things through. Okay, good enough for everybody? Smiles all around? Let's get out of here. Come on!" - Bolt, 2008 |
My Sailor and I are far from immune.
We're putting a pin in some of the bigger discussions around the house right now.
We're discussing the possibility of further construction, international travel, and the whole family planning peice.
But not right now.
With My Sailor's schedule, it's nearly impossible to tackle big topics that require input from both of us. My Sailor gets about 10 hours at home every day. Those aren't "waking hours". That includes sleeping time, getting ready for work, meal time, and down time - so it realistically turns into only about 2-3 hours of 'waking hours' a night.
He doesn't get weekends.
He has 1 day off per week most of the time, and a lot of that is spent sleeping, running errands, and squeezing in some fun. Days off don't include late nights - even a day off must end early enough for him to get sleep so he can be up around 3am to get to work on time the next day.
That means that anything that involves really serious discussion that can wait - does.
Should we get an estimate for the construction? Let's decide in the fall.
Should we foster or go international or go private for our adoption? Should we just foster? hould we even have kids at all?! Maybe we'll just be great aunts and uncles, and babysitters for friends? Should I just get rid of my problematic girlie parts all together? Let's talk about it in the fall. Maybe the schedule will loosen up and give us a better idea of what makes sense for us. 'Cuase I have ZERO desire to be over 35 and just figuring this stuff out. Hell, by my age, my mom was working on her master's degree, working full time, raising my brother and I who were over 10! I'm still working on turing writing into something profitable.
What are we doing for our next vacation? When should we take it? Let's talk about it in the fall, when we know what our money looks like. If we decide to do construction on the house, we should probably save our dough...
I won't lie... it's a damn good thing I'm pretty independent. My Sailor actually enjoys being part of our family dynamic and he participates completely whenever he's available. When he's not though, I have a network of friends and family members I can call for support, the smarts to know how to get the positive endorphines burning, and the courage to ask for help when I need it.
But sometimes, ya know, I hate that damn bulletin board.
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