Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Tall Girl Insecurities

A simple blog about heels brought me to realize that I'm a pretty tall chick. Though I really have a hard time as seeing myself as a tall, leggy blond.

See, I grew up in a house with a dad who is 6'4" and a mom who was about 5'8" at her tallest. (Since then, age has slightly shrunk both of them.) My dad, with his head of white hair and his size, has always been viewed as a "distinguished gentleman". My mom has always been a business powerhouse best known as "the red head". ("So, where did the blond chick come in?" I'm adopted, but that's beside the point, for now. We're talking "nurture", not "nature" for this blog.)

So in my house hold, topping out somewhere around 5'8"ish, I never considered myself "tall". I'm not sure why. The world has always treated me "tall". I was the kid usually in the back of the group pictures. I have lost roles on stage due to my height and the "American Dream" - you know, when you see a couple on stage he is ALWAYS taller than she is. However, I did inherit my mom's "powerhouse" business reputation. I work hard at where ever I am put and love to research and learn more, even if the subject matter isn't one I particularly enjoy. The act of researching and having information and "knowing things" makes me feel special I guess...

But I digress...

All that said, how has my height effected my love life?

Well, I wore jazz shoes in my first wedding - partly for comfort and partly to avoid being taller than my then-groom, who was only about an inch (if that) taller than me.

My current boyfriend wasn't interested in me at first because I was "tall". Granted, the first time he met me was backstage in a show where I was wearing 2 inch heels. With heels like that on, I am nearly eye level with him. (Imagine his surprise when I wore my favorite hiking boots to our first date and only came up to his chest!)

In between them, I did go out on a couple dates with a fellow who was shorter than me. At first, I was nervous, but when I saw that their height didn't bother them I was immediately comfortable with them. Notice, I didn't feel my height was the problem.

Growing up, I was always picked for things like basketball and volleyball.

Yet - I still don't think of myself as "tall". Afterall, the entire family I grew up in is taller than me!

6 foot - now THAT is tall, but meesly little me? Nah. Yet, I avoided wearing heels on many occasions so as not to dwarf my date... but they never asked me to. I just thought they "should" be taller than me. At least, I thought that as a child.

Isn't it amazing how you grow up and grow into yourself a bit? In the end, short or tall, I'll wear heels when I feel like it. As I near 30, it's as if some switch has flipped and I learn to accept myself more and more every day. As for the prince-charming who gets to ride off into the sunset with me? Well, he'll just have to love having a tall woman on his arm - wether I dwarf him on special occasions or not. ;)


  1. Very interesing post! I like your take on the perception of "tall". Height is a big deal in Asian societies (particularly because most Asian people are short). My dad is 5'8", my mom is a petite 5'2". I turned out 5'6". My younger brothers are 5'10" and 5'11". So, we squeaked some height somewhere out of my short(er) parents! Both my parents are thrilled that none of their children are "short". I never really took notice of my height, but I guess I'm glad I'm not on either end of extreme.

    I say, tall or short, try and accept yourself for who you are (as you said). At 5'8", I think you topped off at a very nice height! I would say you are tall, but not too tall. :)

  2. lol I'm 5ft5... maybe.
    So I wish I was "tall" but I'm comfortable being me.