So where have I been lately?
Lately, my life has revolved around adoption paperwork, work, training at the gym, and household chores.
It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks to say the least.
I am happy to report that our homestudy appears to be DONE and FINALLY in the hands of the people that need it. That frees my days up, so I'm not running around to fax this, copy that, get this record from that office, etc. It's been a full 2 weeks of running around, doing everything I possibly can to see if this specific waiting kid is 'our son'. See, he's older than we anticipated starting out at, but we have a lot in common that could make bonding easier (Disney, soccer, other athletics, superheros, etc). But at the same time, he's in a different state (which can make it longer/harder to finalize and visit), and there may be lots of reasons why it's better for him to find a home in his home state. And there is always the chance that our clearances won't get done in time, and we'll miss out on this kid and someone else is destined to be in our family. While I'm cautiously optomistic, it sure makes it hard to plan for anything.
So that said, I'm flying solo and making plans for myself, reworking some budgeting things and finding new and fun things to explore. I'm working on finding the balance of having some 'down time' for me. It's easy for me to over-book myself. (Remember that "time management" goal? I'm still working on that one.) I haven't been able to write anything other than a few emails to My Sailor lately (and oodles of adoption fill-in-the-blank questions), yet all I want to do lately is get lost in the world of Ashta and the Shadowcare clan. Ironically enough, Ashta's 'race' are called Balance Keepers, and here I am, struggling to balance my own world a bit.
As I walked (or shuffled) into the grocery store today (you know - the shuffle everyone wearing a pair of Ugg boots is required to do) to stock up on some cold remedies, I realized that I'm a pretty lucky girl. I mean, sure I stress out over silly things from time to time, but I live a pretty charmed life. I took a look at how I've been spending the most valuable commodity any one has in life (time) and I'm pretty happy with 85% of it. The physical changes from spending time in the gym have been amazing. Just the other day I set a new personal record for squat cleans (100lbs) and split jerks (100lbs). It's been a good investment. I also am becoming more confident and I seem to be getting better in a group setting as well - something that's always been a little challenging for those non-social butterfly. I really had to challenge my social ablities over the years, and it's been working. I may still be a wallflower at times, I'm much more comfortable meeting people now.
I also have a job. While it doesn't leave the impact I want to leave on the world, it does allow me to do other fun things - like training and the occasional travel.
I have 2 of the best snuggle buddies anyone could ask for.
And, sure, I may fly solo from time to time, but I get to be married to a guy that Really, truly, actually loves me. Someone who proves all the time that he wants to be in a relationship with me, no matter the distance. It seems that everyday the military Facebook pages are FLOODED with people looking for support in snooping through their significant other's phone or emails... I learned a long time ago that if I feel like I need to snoop, trust is already deeply damaged. We operate on full access around here, but we don't ever need to use it because we genuinely tell each other the truth. There's no need to snoop when you don't already suspect someone of being less than honest.
There is only 1 commodity in this life that we all have. It's a limited quantity and, once spent, you can never earn it back.
And that's time.
While I'm glad I'm spending my time on things I find worth the expenditure, I do look forward to paring down my schedule and spending more time with Ashta, Silent, and TheMist very very soon.
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