A 'Tree' Loving Halloween

For Halloween 2013, I went as a BadAss. (Photos thanks to Trainer Guy.)  

One of the greatest perils of working at home is that you tend to become a little disconnected from the world. Especially when you've lived alone for any length of time.

Holidays tend to turn into, "Eh, it's just Fill-In-The-Feast-Or-Consumer-Laden-Day. No big deal."

I've always celebrated those that were important to me, and Halloween, while fun, was never really that high on my hit list - despite being a theater junkie.

Sure, I love to get dressed up if I have a party or something to go do. But just for me? Nah.

Ironically enough, I accidently got dressed up this Halloween. I was half way through my lifting routine when I realized my shirt was on inside out. Not that it matters- it's a plain purple shirt anyway.  It's a 'back up' peice of clothing (you know, the ones that actually mean 'I need to do laundry').

I've come to prefer nothing on my arms and shoulders when I work out and capris to long pants as well. I know I'm going to sweat and get hot/overheated anyway. I don't need to make it worse by throwing more cloth on top of it.

What's crazy is the effect I can see on my body from all the lifestyle adjustments. I wish I would have taken sideways before and after photos, because I can see a massive difference in body shape. Sure, I'm still curvy. I suspect I always will be no matter my size. It's just the way I'm shaped - which is certainly just fine by me! I'm enjoying being strong.

Which leads me into the next topic...

I've been quitely studying body dysmorphy . It's that phenomonon where people (usually women) see themselves as VASTLY different than they are. You know, when you talk to an attractive woman and you come to learn she thinks she's fat because she's not built like a Victoria Secret model. Or maybe she is built like a Victoria Secret model, but she sees her self as 50+lbs overweight. Maybe you recognize these things in yourself. I certainly did! Looking back on high school photos now, I see a normal teenager. But then?! No way! I felt like I WAS the elephant in the room.

Eventually my mind changed (with time, acceptance, maturity, and with the help of a great therapist). I think I have a fairly level headed view of myself now - or at least I recognize where I've come from. In fact, while I was really tired during the mile run that capped off today's work out, I kept thinking "Ya know, 6 months ago, you couldn't have done this.... 10 months ago you definately couldn't have done this." My body is changing shape as I put the work in. The whole shape changing thing has become a by-product of doing what I know is healthy for me. It's a nice (though admittedly strange) mindset to be in. I've watched a few films on the topic and highly recommend "America The Beautiful." This is one excerpt that stayed with me. In fact, I listen to it almost daily and still smile.

Finally, I love my Tree.
So there is no candy in my house - we don't need the left overs and we'll probably eat them. Setting my tree up for success.

If your someone who struggles with body image (or know someone who does), check out the documentary. It's the right price - FREE - on hulu.com.